For the rest of his life, I can't help but wonder if my son will have an aversion to the color yellow. Yellow, when you're in elementary school, represents trouble. As in, everyone starts out the day on green. But if you get in trouble, your color switches to yellow. There is nothing about school that is scarier for AJ than the fear of getting a color change.
Unfortunately, it's been happening more and more often lately. He's not getting in any kind of serious trouble. To get a color change to yellow is basically the equivalent of the teacher raising her voice. It's nothing we would even be notified about (that doesn't happen until the color changes from yellow to blue) except that AJ dutifully tells us each time because we've also instilled great fear in him of what will happen if we ever find out that he didn't tell us when he's done something wrong.
Typically, AJ has averaged about one color change per month. But in just the last two weeks, he's had three - for things like not paying attention, talking when the teacher talks and not being quiet fast enough. I think. Because this, again, is how AJ has relayed the stories to us.
After the second color change, we decided to try something we'd learned in a recent Sunday School class that focused on discipline. We told him the color changes were not okay, and we asked him what he thought the punishment should be if he got another one. He suggested taking away his new iPod for a week. Okay.
The very next day, AJ tearfully informed us he'd gotten yet another color change.
Away went the iPod. In addition, Jeff suggested AJ write a list for his teacher of five ways he can avoid getting another color change. Here's what he wrote:
Meanwhile, I emailed the teacher and asked if the increase in color changes means his behavior is getting worse, or if she's increasing expectations as the year progresses.
It's the latter. She went on to write:
Alex simply does have a challenge staying focused. Not because he is acting out in a negative way, he just seems to need my assistance to keep him on task. He likes to talk!! He has wonderful things to share! He easily gets distracted by what others are doing...and with all of that, he has a hard time staying on track himself. However, I truly believe he is trying to do better!
Oh dear! She could be describing me. How am I supposed to discipline my child for lack of discipline, when I'm guilty of the same?
Doesn't it just figure? AJ gets his height and athletic ability from his father. His crazy hair from my father. His taste buds from... I honestly can't figure that one out. And what part of me managed to latch on to his DNA chain? My chattiness.
The poor kid.
Hmmmm. And we thought you'd never talk.
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